Or maybe that’s just me.
As I sipped a session IPA and settled into my couch divot for the AFC Championship game two weeks ago, the Bengals’ star wide receiver, Ja’Marr Chase, hauled in a big first down catch to kick off Cincinnati’s shocking comeback against the favored Kansas City Chiefs. I almost spit out my beer when I heard what color commentator Tony Romo said next:
“Chase is… on the case!”
My eyes grew wide with excitement, and I rifled through Twitter to see if anyone else noticed what I did: that Tony Romo landed a dad joke about Paw Patrol on national TV. Without hesitation, Romo punctuated a huge moment in an NFL playoff game with Chase the police pup’s catchphrase. And in my eyes, he became the corny dad icon that the world needs right now.
I shouldn’t have been surprised to see that #TonyRomo didn’t have many hits related to Paw Patrol on Twitter. 98% of tweets were about how much he sucks: at broadcasting, quarterbacking, playing golf, smiling… etc. He’s a public figure, an athlete, a blue-check-mark social media presence, and haters love to hate on a guy who played for America’s Team and didn’t quite live up to lofty expectations. But from this day forward, the hate stops with me. I live in Los Angeles, where the hometown Rams will play for Super Bowl glory this weekend. I have two young kids. And every minute of NFL action that I squeeze into my viewing schedule is sandwiched between episode after episode of Paw Patrol. When Romo used Chase’s catch phrase, I didn’t just laugh at the lame connection with Ja’Marr’s last name; I nearly wept. I felt seen. Tony Romo, former Pro Bowl quarterback, TV personality, famous person and subject of hateful tweets, is just like me. He can’t get that habit-forming show out of his head either. And he let us all know in the goofy, cringe-worthy way that only a fellow dad would appreciate.
Adam Sandler shocked the world late last year when Vogue named him their fashion icon of 2021. In LA, the “Dad Hat” is enjoying a moment. And two Sundays ago, Tony Romo claimed the early lead for Dad Icon of 2022. Watch out, Sandler. His natural ability to connect Paw Patrol to something as diametrically opposed as the brutal, violent game of American football was only building on the solid dad foundation Romo has been building for years. While he was still playing in the NFL, pre-kids, he famously stopped on the side of the highway in the middle of the night to help a stranded couple change a tire. He’s a pitchman for Sketchers, a shoe brand that is clearly making a run at the white New Balance 624’s for top spot in dad fashion with their emphasis on cushioning over style. And while Romo’s casual, fanboy flair in the broadcast booth fueled the haters, his record-breaking payday in 2020 showed that plenty of viewers wanted to hear commentary from a former player who sounds like he’s one of your dad friends cracking jokes on the couch between generous scoops of guacamole.
I learned via Twitter that many haters mute the TV when Romo is on the broadcast. As a new defender of my favorite celebrity dad, I have a message for them: grow up, Uncle Rico. If you think that Romo’s analysis is lacking, that he doesn’t focus enough on the movement of offensive linemen or the adjustments of a talented defensive coordinator, or that he doesn’t have the right to comment on the championship pedigree of today’s NFL stars because he never won the Big One himself, let me remind you: neither do you. In fact, in a world full of Uncle Ricos who peaked in high school (or in 6th grade, if you’re me), Tony Romo is better at being Uncle Rico than you are too, because he owns it. After he floored me with the “Chase is on the case” comment, the Bengals-Chiefs game went into overtime. After an interception of Patrick Mahomes, the Bengals marched deep into Chiefs territory, a short field goal kick away from sending Cincinnati to their first Super Bowl since 1989. Romo and play-by-play announcer Jim Nantz discussed whether it would be wise to attempt the field goal on 2nd or 3rd down, rather than waiting for 4th down.
“I’ve seen guys in the playoffs drop a snap before in a big situation,” Romo said.
Fresh off his Paw Patrol dad joke, with the game on the line, Romo landed a sarcastic, self-deprecating bombshell. He was referring to himself in what was perhaps the lowest point of his NFL career when, in 2007, he dropped the snap for a potential game-winning field goal against the Seattle Seahawks. Humility, vulnerability, dad jokes, Sketchers… I’m sorry, Uncle Rico, but I want to be Tony Romo when my kids grow up.
If Romo had a Pup Tag, Ryder would be sending him the signal right now: Parents need you! We need you to bring levity to the winner-take-all, second place is the first loser, GOAT-obsessed world of professional sports. We need a voice that is fun and light-hearted to welcome us to the escape that sports provide us while we’re feeding a baby, sneaking a livestream on our phone in the pick-up line at school, or watching out of the corner of our eye on a Sunday afternoon while our kids fight and scream on the floor in front of us. We need more dad jokes to break up the monotony and struggle of parenting in a pandemic. We need celebrities like you to tell us that it’s ok if you can’t stop thinking about Paw Patrol. We need the one, true Uncle Rico, our Uncle Romo, to set the tone for this generation of over-stressed, over-scheduled, and over-analyzing modern parents.
Someone get that man a dad hat and line up his interview with Vogue. Also, CBS, will you please schedule Tony for coverage of March Madness and The Masters too? Maybe get him some cameos on the nightly news? We parents need to hear from 2022’s Dad Icon during football’s offseason as well. On the double.
So good, Dave! Almost did a spit take myself at “couch divot.” Too true.
Thank you!
Dude. Ending this piece with on the double is a stroke of genius. Props.
LOL, thank you! The quotes come natural, the show is in my veins.